Breaking the Girl
by Dymphna Colleen
Summary: Hermione reflects on her life and how she became a powerful witch fighing for the dark side...*revised 5/19/03*
1. One: breaking the girl

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Title: Breaking the Girl (1/1)

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Author: Dymphna Colleen

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E-mail: Little_Ska_Chika@Yahoo.com 

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Category: Darkarts

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Keywords: Hermione, Draco, Dark Arts, Romance

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Rating: PG-13

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Spoilers: All books

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Summary: After the death of her mother, and the lose of a friendship, Hermione channels all her emotions, anger and frustration through practicing the dark arts.

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Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. The song, Breaking the Girl, belongs to Red Hot Chili Peppers. 

A/N- Ok, well, you guys, this is my first attempt at a Harry Potter fanfiction, let alone a d/hr romance…anyway, this isn't one of those stories where Draco suddenly for no freaking reason falls in love with Hermione, and he isn't all soft and mushy and like "Oh, I am sorry for all that I have done, your not an ugly bucktooth mudblood, you're a beautiful young woman, please forgive me" and then Hermione is all like "OOOOH DRACO…I've loved you from the day I first moment I met you, kiss me NOW, please!" and then they fall into a passionate kiss…no, this is darker, Hermione is drawn into the dark arts during a time of being weak minded and desperate for a way to channel her emotions and anger out. 

Ok then, now that I have said all that, I hope that you enjoy this story!! OK then…read on…

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"Twisting and turning 

your feelings are burning

You're breaking the girl"

~Breaking the Girl~

~Red Hot Chili Peppers~

~*~

I sat in front of the large vanity. My dark brown hair, cascaded down my back in a waterfall of ringlets. My plump lips were crimson red, which contrasted my white, flawless complexion. There was a small amount of rouge on my cheeks, accentuating my high, elegant cheekbones. 

I am a picture of perfection. Young, elegant, rich…evil. I had everything I needed. Money, power and my love. I remember how this started out. I remember like it was yesterday. But it was many, many years ago. You'd think that the memories of my life past would be forgotten. But know, I hold on to them. They're memories, not cherished, but memories regardless. I remember how it happened…I remember.

Flashback

I sat alone, in my desolate room, no lights, no music, just anger (a/n, hehe, sorry I was listening to Sugar, by System of a Down when I wrote this part). Well, not really anger, rage. Perhaps. Loneliness, most definitely. Sadness and grief, yes. This year had started out so well, I had been made Head Girl, I had my friends, I had my parents. But soon, all that would change.

I remember getting the letter from my father. It was such a beautiful day. Clear and crisp, the hint of autumn in the air, like October should be. I had been sitting in the courtyard with Harry, I don't know where Ron was, probably off snogging with that skank of a girlfriend of his. 

Ron had started dating a Ravenclaw. Seventh year named Charlotte Howells. She was smart, and was actually a contender for Head Girl (like she actually had a chance next to me). Though she was smart, she had no respect for herself, and dressed like a whore. She was pretty though, with black hair, white skin and blue eyes. Her perfect smile and laugh. It wasn't fair, Ron should have been mine. Now, with his girlfriend he had completely forgotten about me. 

It didn't matter though…I still had Harry, and he was my best friend, the only one I had in this whole damn school. Besides my books that it. We spent every waking hour with each other. Just sitting and talking. But Harry had changed over the three years from fourth year to the current year, our seventh. He had matured. His boyish good looks had melted away to a handsome young man. He had grown taller and now toward over me, standing at 5" 11". But he had changed more than that. His once carefree and easygoing manner had given away too a more reserved, careful and worry wart personality. His face had a few lines, caused by the frequent pain he would have due to his scar. This year, most nights if not all night, he would wake up and have to go to the nurse for help.

I remember he was there when I found out.

I sat in the courtyard, on stone bench, reading my book, _A History of Hogwarts, _when Harry bounded from the Quidditch field toward me. I didn't notice until he covered my eyes. 

"Guess who" he said to me.

"Hmm, gee, it couldn't be Harry." I said sarcastically with a slight hint of agitation in my voice. He removed his hands and laughed.

"Well, great googly-moogalies, it IS Harry, I never would of guessed."  


I said smartly.

He sat next to me on the bench. 

"What ya reading?" He asked.

"_A History of Hogwarts" _I replied, not bothering to look up at him. 

"What is this, like the millionth time that you've read the book." He said taking the now battered book out of my Hand. 

"Harry, please, please, give me my book back. NOW!! HARRY, I a not playing games at this. Please give it-" I had been cut short when an owl flew onto my shoulder. "Why hello there." I said, and he handed me a letter.

"Hoo" he said and flew off.

I sat down and opened the letter. 

Dear Hermione~

I do not know how to tell you this. Whatever I say will not help stop the hurt. But your mother, she has died. It was rather sudden, and unexpected, car accident. I am sure that you are as distraught as I am, and until you come home to me, all I can give you in comforting words, we must stay strong for each other, it is what your mother would of wanted, I have informed Albus Dumbledore, and you will be returning home at the next available time.

Love

Dad~

I stared at the letter. I had an empty look on my face. I got up, and tore the letter up, and screamed, the loudest scream I ever produced in my entire life. My mother had died…

I stood, shocked for a minute and then I ran, I ran blindly. I am pretty sure that I left Harry a bit dazed but, oh well. I ran. And I ran. And I ran. I don't know where. It was almost like my legs were in control of my body, and my mind had no part in it. Finally, I came to a wall…and in my exhaustion I leaned against it panting hard…

…And then I feel…

Then, I was asleep.

****

::Hours Later::

I Awoke, and looked around. I was in a room that I had never been in before. I got up, and waved my wand, and suddenly, candles everywhere lit, illuminating the once dark room.

I looked around. I noticed a strong oak desk, a tall bookcase, full of books and a plush leather chair. I walked to the bookcase and looked at the books. They were all shapes and sizes, leather bound and others made of sewn parchment. The books were obviously old. I looked at the titles 

"_Darkness Within: A Way to Reach Your Full Potential in the Dark Arts" _and "_A Complete Guide to Dark Arts.:_

I pulled one of the large leather books, I knew it was wrong and every fiber in my body wanted me to stop. But I still took it down. It was very heavy. I walked over to a table and sat down with it. I opened it up very slowly, feeling electricity run through my fingers, charging my body and I started reading through it…

I finished one book after another, completely absorbed by the knowledge I was consuming…it was addictive like a drug. I felt more power by merely reading it. It was amazing. 

As the night wore on, the candles slowly burnt out, as did I and I feel into a peaceful sleep.

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::next morning::

A bird calling woke me up with a start. I jumped up and the book fell to the ground. I looked around, where was I? What happened? Then it all sunk in. My mother, the letter, and then me, running to this room. And then I found these books. The one's on dark arts. I looked. I had read about 4 of them. I yawned. 

What I had read was amazing. All of it. The dark side were more than just evil, it was an art. 

Elegant and beautiful. Seductive and refined. It had a certain mystery to it. And that's why you couldn't put it down. AS I started reading it, I found myself being pulled deeper and deeper into it. It was all amazing. The power that could be achieved. 

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If only I could achieve such power. 

I imagined the power that I could hold. The wisdom and the knowledge. It would exceed my peers beyond belief. I grabbed another book and sat down the at the oak desk. I opened the book, and felt that same powerful electric charge I had earlier. It was electrifying and made me shiver with power. 

****

::week's later::

It had been almost two months since my mother's death. I went to her funeral, I cried…I did all the things a daughter in mourning would…

And when I got back to Hogwarts I went straight to my room, and read my books. They were like a drug, once you had tried it, you wanted more. And the more you read, the more you had to read, just to stay up. Soon, I started trying spells on small animals. Nothing big. Just little animals, like spiders. But soon I wanted to move on. After I had mastered as many spells as I could I soon started learning how to do spells with out a wand. With my mind. The true mark of a powerful sorceress. 

It was a draining process and I could only do a few spells at a time…

But soon, even that stopped becoming and obstacle for me. I finished all the books in the room. 

But I wanted more. More and More…more power, knowledge. EVERYTHING. 

The more I learned, the more I forgot about my problems. My mother, Ron forgetting me with that knew whore of a girlfriend of his, Harry's pain….

It all seemed to vanish with each new spell I learned. 

I needed no emotions when I had my power. 

Soon, I finished all the books in my personal little library. I started sneaking down to the 

Restricted Section of the library, with the aid of Harry's invisibility cloak. 

I walked into the boy's dorm and went through Harry's chest. He had given me permission to do so whenever I needed. After all, I was his friend. After a short search I found what I was looking for. I pulled the cloak out with a flourish and threw it over my back, and as quickly and quietly as I had appeared in the room, I slowly walked out again. 

I opened up the portrait and ran out and surreptitiously ran down the hallway, trying to make as little sound as I possibly could. After the familiar walk from my dorm, I finally made it to the library. 

I pushed open the heavy mahogany doors and entered. I looked around to make sure no one was around. The place was deserted. I walked to the restricted section of the library and pulled the cloak off of me. I searched through the shelves and pulled out a book. I took in the feel, the power of the book, the darkness. It was beautiful, breathe taking. 

I walked to the back of the library and sat in a corner. 

"Lux" (a darker variation of the lumos spell) I muttered, suddenly a small ball of light appeared before me. I grabbed hold of it, and twisted it counter clockwise, the light grew brighter…I then waved my hand and whispered "Suspentia" and the light was suspended in mid-air, about a foot above the book and a few inches to the side, so not to block my line of vision. 

I started to read…I got so in to the book. It was a book about how to perform the Crucatius and Imperius curses without using to much energy…I dove into the book, forgetting my surroundings.

::The Next Day::

I walked to potions class, dragging my feet not wanting to go. Despite the fact I was good at potions class (I was good at most classes actually, if not all), I hated Snape, and he hated me.

But then again, you can't be friends with everyone, can you?

I sat in the back of the room…bored and tired…we were learning about the Polyjuice Potion. 

Been there, done that.

Nearly 5 years ago.

Ha, what a joke.

I sat there as Snape drowned on about useless information I have known for ages now. A spider scuttled past me on the desk. 

"Impedia" I muttered. The spider slowed down, and now it was as fast moving as fast as a turtle, if not slower. 

"Imperius" I muttered, waving her hand. "Do a flip" I whispered. The spider began flipping through the air. I let out a snicker.

"What, may I ask, do you find so funny about Polyjuice Potions?" He asked, venom in his voice. 

The whole class was staring at me. The Spider was doing a cartwheel on my desk now. 

"Stupefy" I said, the spider landed on my desk with a quiet thud.

"No, Sir. I was just thinking of a joke someone just told me." I lied quickly.

"Hmmm, really. Well Miss Granger, if this joke, is as funny as you say, perhaps you'd like to share it with the whole class." He said, smirking.

"No, Sir, that's ok. I wouldn't want to take away from your valuable lesson time." I said. I hate getting up in front of large groups and speak. Especially my peers, and to make things worse, half of them were Slytherins. I hit my head on the desk.

"No, Miss Granger, I insist. I am need for a good laugh right now anyway. So please." He stated. 

His menacing class made me get up to the front of the class. Frightened. How I wish I could hit him with a torturing curse right now. I should…no, down girl, don't want t o get expelled. 

"Umm, well." I thought hard for a joke. "Ummm, well, these two men were walking there dogs. 

One had a Toy Poodle and one had a Golden Lab. The one with the Golden Lab said: "Gee, I sure would like a beer right now." The other one said "But we can't go into the bar, we have dogs."

"Watch this said the other man." With that he pulled out his sunglasses, put them on and proceeded to walk into the bar. "Hmm if he can do it, so can I" Said the man with the Toy Poodle. So with that, he took his shades out, put them on and walked into the bar.

Once inside the bartender asked "Sir, what do you think you are doing." 

He said, "Well, you see, this Poodle is my seeing eye dog. I need him to take me places."

"Your seeing eye dog is a Poodle?" Asked the Bar tender."They gave me a poodle!" The man exclaimed." I finished, I felt myself flush, as a few weeks chuckles arose from the crowd (The Gryfindor Side no less)."

"Yes then Granger, sit down. 10 points from your house for disrupting my class. And that _HORRIBLE_ joke." He said.

"Yes Sir." I said sitting down, glaring at his back. I sat during the rest of the class in silence, and did my potion. When the bell finally rang, signaling the much-awaited dismissal, a piece of paper landed in front of me. I opened it up and read.

**__**

Hermione~

Please do me the honor of meeting

Me at midnight by the lake.

Thank you.

D~

I read the messy scrawl. D. That's how it was signed. Well. Whatever…I'll go. What do I have to lose.

****

::that night, Midnight::

I pulled Harry's cloak over my shoulders and walked down the elegant marble staircase to the entrance hall. I walked to the heavy oak door and pushed them open. The cold March air was like daggers. I shivered and pulled the cloak tighter around me. I stepped onto the solid ground. It was covered in a light blanket of snow, no more than 2 inches. 

It crunched beautifully under my toes. I sighed I loved that sound so much. I walked toward the lake. I looked around, no one was there. I checked my watch, it was 12:01 in the morning. I shivered as a crisp wind blew. 

"Hermione" I heard softly. I looked around. Perhaps it was the wind. For the calling was no more than a whisper. But than I heard it again. Louder.

"Hermione" I looked around. I looked toward the lake. It wasn't frozen. It never freezes. But, there was a figure standing on it. 

"Come, Hermione." It said beckoning me forward. I looked unsure. I thought that I might be dreaming all this. It would make sense. But I put my feet in the water, expecting to sink. But, instead I walked on it, as if though it were ice. Uneasily, I took a few baby steps. When I found myself perfectly fine…I began to take larger strides, until I came to the middle of the lake.

The persons back was turned to me, and they were covered in a long cloak, which hid their head.

"Who is it that wished to speak to me?" I asked…

"Hermione" The person breathed my name out carefully. 

"Well, at least turn around, so I may know who I am talking to." I demanded, my hands on my hips. 

"Ha, Hermione, as always bossy. I am afraid, I can't reveal myself yet. But, in do time I will. I fear, that if I tell you who I am, you might not want to stay. I have an offer for you, Hermione Granger. An offer that I hope you take." He said in a sing song voice. It was refreshing and calming, his voice, like silk, and I felt myself being lulled by it.

"Oh, really, and what, may I ask, is that offer?" I said.

"Hermione…I understand that you, in your spare time, have been practicing Black Magic." 

I gasped. How could this person I know. 

"Oh, I have my ways." He said, as if though reading my mind. "My Lord, has taken interest in you. He wants you to join his ranks. You are very powerful. With you on our side we couldn't lose." 

"What makes you think I am going to join the dark side…just because some stranger on a lake asked me too?" I asked snuffly.

"I didn't say you had to…I merely asked you. This, my dear, I an offer of a lifetime. The power, the wealth. Everything, the world. It could all be yours." He said. 

I stood there on that lake. The wind rustling my hair and I thought about it. I already had everything I needed. Friends, a family. What more could I need. But then again. I had Harry…everyone else had abandoned me…and my family. My Mother was dead, under the cold ground in some London cemetery…my father, has officially gone neuters. What more could I ask for? Plenty. 

"First…" I said "Reveal yourself to me…so that I may know who is making me this offer."

The person let out a heavy sigh and turned around. Slowly he lifted his hands and lowered his hood. The full moon outlined his profile and gave his milky skin and even paler glow (of it is possible).

"Malfoy" I gasped.

"Yeah…" He said, "It's me. You want to make something of it?"

"No, but why, you of all people." I said.

"I am loyal to my Lord. He wished for you to join him…he said you would be a 'wonderful' asset to our cause. Powerful, smart, attractive…and best friends with Potter." 

I involuntarily shivered. 

"Think about it Hermione. Everything you could ever need. All at your feet." He said. I stood there, frozen in thought. Would I throw all I had ever known away? For all the power I could have. Then again, I wouldn't lose much. All I had ever known was nearly gone, I wouldn't lose much. But what I would gain…it is almost mind boggling the power I could of held. 

I thought for one more moment. What I was doing.

And finally, throwing what was left of my dismal life away I said.

"Yes."

He smiled…"Good, now come, I will introduce you formally to your new Lord." He grabbed my hand. I was shocked, a Malfoy, touching my dirty hand. He muttered something, and the scene I was in melted away.

****

end flashback

I felt cold hands, the same ones that had taken me to the Dark Lord for the first time, those seven years ago (I am now 24). The same ones that held me now…in these days of battle…

"Come Love" He whispered, "We mustn't keep everyone waiting." 

I nodded and got up. I smoothed out my black satin robe. 

"You look gorgeous." He told me.

"I know." I said, and looked at him.

Draco and I were a picture of perfection. Young, powerful, rich and in love. 

Like he had promised me all those years ago. I would have everything I would ever need.

He was right.

__

I do.

He took my hand. I relished the feeling of his cold touch…and we descended the stairs, an image 

of perfect evil. 

Perfect…

The End of the Story

A/N- so what did you guys think?? Was it any good…it was my first shot a Harry Potter fanfic. I do hope that you liked, it, really I do…I'll be sad if you didn't enjoy it, because then, I would have been a bad writer…anyway…please, be kind and leave a review…or you can e-mail me Little_Ska_Chika@Yahoo.com ok!! OK!!

Bye then!!

~Dymphna Colleen~

Breaking the Girl

By Red Hot Chili Peppers

(I highly recommend you d/l this song)
    
    
    I am a man
    Cut from the know
    Rarely do friends
    Come and then go
    She was a girl
    Soft but estranged
    We were the two
    Our lives rearranged
    Feeling so good that day
    A feeling of love that day
    Twisting and turning
    Your feelings are burning
    You're breaking the girl
    She meant you no harm
    Think you're so clever
    But now you must sever
    You're breaking the girl
    He loves no one else
    Raised by my dad
    Girl of the day
    He was my man
    That was the way
    She was the girl
    Left alone
    Feeling the need
    To make me her home
    I don't know what when or why
    The twilight of love had arrived
    Twisting and turning
    Your feelings are burning
    You're breaking the girl
    She meant you no harm
    Think you're so clever
    But now you must sever
    You're breaking the girl
    He loves no one else
    Twisting and turning
    Your feelings are burning
    You're breaking the girl
    She meant you no harm
    Think you're so clever
    But now you must sever
    You're breaking the girl
    He loves no one else


	2. HELP!

Hey you guys, I need help, do you think that I should make a sequel or keep it as it is. When I first wrote this story, I wanted to keep it a one chapter story. I am not sure now, because people are telling me to write a sequel. What do you think?

~Dymphna Colleen~ 

little_Ska_chika@yahoo.com


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